Automoblow lets Tesla drivers look even more like wankers

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Chris M
Updated July 9, 2020
Published July 9, 2020
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Stressed out executives can now have some exxtra special ‘alone time’ behind the wheel of their Tesla vehicle, courtesy of an integration with the Autoblow AI.

Long-time readers may remember that in 2018 we introduced you to the Autoblow, an AI-powered blow-job simulator, which was finally released last year after a successful crowdfunding campaign.

With the rise of autonomous driving looming ever larger and advanced cruise controls commonplace, the average motorist has a bit more time on their hands than they used to.

Enter, then the Automoblow, an adjustable arm that fits in the cup-holder of your car, with the other end holding the Autoblow – the result is a hands-free experience to pass time on the freeway.

And before we go any further, we should note that while local laws will vary, most countries or states won’t take kindly to a distracted driver cruising down the road with their dick in an Autoblow. Many of those same states and countries will also have laws against public indecency, that the device may well violate if used as marketed.

Nonetheless, on the off-chance you have a Tesla, some private land to cruise around on, and nothing better to do, the company suggests it could be a good way to reduce stress levels.

Autoblow inventor Brian Sloan explains: “I know some people will tell me that this invention is unnecessary but I believe those same people, had they been born earlier, would have been late adopters of electricity and the automobile.

“Artificial intelligence, as it is used in self driving cars and even in our male sex toy, frees humans from mundane tasks and allows us to spend our time in more productive ways or in leisure. As self-gratification is a popular leisure activity and controlling a car is not particularly enjoyable, it is self-evident that many men will choose to buy an Automoblow.”

The company advertises the product as being compatible with Tesla’s cruise control setting, but that has more to do with safety (i.e. a high level of semi-autonomous driving) than any technical limitations. It is, after all, essentially an arm that sticks out of your cup holder.

We’ve already noted that Automoblow is likely to be illegal to use for many people traversing a city ring road at peak time, and the general advice we’d offer is to definitely not do that. Check your local driving and indecency laws carefully if you do decide to proceed.

Automoblow will be released this Fall, priced at $139 (not including the Autoblow AI device), which sounds a bit pricey to us for a robo-arm that sits in a cup holder.

Read Next: Smart sex toys are still a bit like the early days of smartphones

Topics mentioned in this article Autoblow AI
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Chris M has worked in technology journalism for over a decade, and brings his nerdy expertise to looking at what goes on under the hood of sex tech.With over a decade of expertise in his field, Chris brings a nerdy perspective to his exploration of the fascinating world behind the scenes. His articles have graced the pages of renowned publications such as Engadget, TechRadar, AskMen, and The Register.
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